Monday, January 09, 2006

Welcome to freakout-ville, population me...

As I was laying in bed this morning, trying to force myself to get up and start the day, I decided to instant message AG, as I often do, because he's always bored to death at work. I made some offhandedly flirtatious remark and he responded with, "Are you busy Feb 24-28?" So, if I confirm that I'm available, he will be coming to visit in a month and a half. I want to meet him. I do. However, I can't believe I'm doing this. Meeting someone I met on the internet is sketchy enough. Now, I'm going to be meeting someone I met on the internet who's flying up from GA for the occasion. Oh god.

The more I talk to him, the more I like him. And it's freaking me out. What if he visits and we actually click. Then what? Either we have to engage in some exhausting long-distance relationship, or we have to call it off, or one of us has to move. None of these seem like totally desirable options.

To add insult to injury, I'm auditioning for a choir today--the Young New Yorker's Choir. The main draw is that it's performing the Durufle Requiem. Secondarily, everyone in the choir is under thirty, so I figure it would be a good way to meet some people, possibly make some new friends. I'm not TOO nervous about the audition. Yesterday, after I finished practicing in my room, Lyssa came over and said, "Jacquie, if you don't get into this choir, there's something seriously wrong with the world." Yet, I'm a soprano. And for some reason nature produces far too many of us, which means lots of pretty-voiced sopranos like me get rejected in spite of their talent. Right now, I'm pretty confident; however, I will be pretty embarrassed if I don't get in. Keeping my fingers crossed. Trying not to freak out.



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