Thursday, January 05, 2006

Atlanta is far away...

Just got off the phone with "atlanta guy" as he's known by my roommates (and usually, by me as well). I will change his name to "AG" to protect the innocent, but also because it's easy to type. AG lives in Atlanta. This would normally be a deal breaker but he came to Atlanta via New Jersey via South Africa, which is definitely a deal maker. His accent is super sexy. And he and I have a similar sense of shyness and modesty. We had a completely veiled conversation about our sexual history the other night, in which the word "sex" was never once used, but we somehow managed to communicate exactly what we meant. It was wonderful. I'm generally a very open person but I don't like to talk openly about my sex/love life if I don't have to. With some people (aka my sister) I have to talk concrete specifics or they're not satisfied. So, I can't hide anything. AG and I hide, but we know we're hiding and it's ok. And I've recently discovered a tenderness about him that I didn't see before. We often e-mail back and forth from work and two days ago (after we had stayed up until 3am that day talking on the phone) I sent him an e-mail saying I had fallen asleep at my desk. He's since seemed extremely, and very sweetly, concerned about me getting enough sleep. In fact, he left me a message saying not to call him after 12 (which I did anyway), though not because he needed sleep (though I woke him up when I called) but because he was worried I wouldn't get enough sleep. It seemed very genuine and I appreciate that. He told me that he has to get up for a tennis match on Saturday so he wants to go to sleep kinda early tomorrow. So I said I wouldn't keep him up or maybe I wouldn't call him tomorrow and I'd speak to him on Saturday instead. His response was almost pleading, No, you can call. Normally I would read that as desperation, but I don't think it is. I think it's tenderness, which I haven't felt in a while. I don't feel that way about him yet, though I like him very much, but the fact that he feels that way about me is very gratifying. I just wish he lived closer.



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